Ok guys, here it is. It's 11:27 as of right now, and in 33 minutes it will be gradutaion day.

13 years. That's how many years I've put into the Roselle Park school system. 18 years is how many I've put into this town.

I could try to be profound like Amy, blunt like Cat or Sonia, sentimental like Lori, or sad like Julia. But that's not me. I want to just say what's on my mind--my final goodbyes. No tears, just closure.

Michelle - My best friend. The one who stuck by me all the years. I love you and don't know what I'd do without you. I'm gonna have to call you up everyday next year and every year to give you my daily dose of craziness.

Sonia - My crazy partner. I think you made me the way I am--completely psychotic. I've had more fun with you than any person I've ever met and I'm going to miss our random psychoness. Haha.... _____ness. So many memories, I'm gonna come visit you next year and every year!!! A whole 20 miles away!

Hina - My rock of strength! Where would I be without you to listen to me cry about all my problems all the time? I love you dear, and your split personality will always make me wonder, where did you go wrong?

Gati - Oh my Gati!!! Karate Gati, I'm gonna miss you so much. Part of the reason I act so crazy is because I know I always make you laugh...harder than anyone else. I need you man! To keep me crazy, and to defend me when enemies attack!

Anuja - My love! Anuja, I NEED YOU! You're so crazy at times yet so smart and sweet. You tell it like it is, and I admire you so much. Stay awesome and don't let anyone change who you are.

Payal - You're the strangest person I've ever met, and the only one who can truly make me crack up without me having to be crazy myself. I couldn't be happier that you moved here and if you ever want to call me up in the middle of the night, feel free. I love you.

Amy - Oh Amy...you're one of the smartest, coolest people I ever met. I'm honored to call you my friend because of your kindness and honesty. Never change..truly. You have to remain who you are and I will surely miss hearing your outrageously sarcastic comments next year and every year thereafter. I'll have to trust livejournal for my dose.

Julia - So many things to say, but must condense. Although we fought more than I thought humanly possible, I will always remain your friend. We've gone through almost everything together. I love you darling and don't let any stupid boys that may come your way change the wonderful personality you now hold. Have fun with Drew next year!!!

Carmene - We became such good friends, this year especially. I love you girl! We made our jokes to each other, and our times at the lunch table were indescribable. We share a love for BSB, Passions, and oh so much more. *wink wink* LOL. Anyway, thanks for being such a great friend…someone who believes in what I do!

Cat - My kitty. I love you hunny. You gave me my new lj name! I can't laughing at Ramsey kids with anyone else but you my darling. You gave me my first strange and new experience with the RHPS and I will NEVER forget it! BELIEVE ME! *kisses*

Lori - Oh LORI! You are so different than what people tend to believe. I hope everything in your future is wonderful and full of fun. Good luck in all of your future obstacles and good times. Stay sweet and stay on livejournal.

Jess - Oh man. Thank God you were there for me this year-most importantly. Dealing with people *cough* Ms. McWhore, you made it so much easier because I knew I had someone on my side! I had a friend in computers and now I have another friend forever! I love you—keep working hard and you’ll get where you want to be.

Denise - Although we drifted apart after our wonderful years at the Alfano house we came back to each other because we're friends for life. Our lunch table this year was made up of many different people brought together by one thing...and you know what that is! Stay awesome.

Derek - Oh God. I remember my first day meeting you and I cried. Oh how appropriate that "That's What Friends are For" just started to play. You're another one that makes me laugh in such a way I can't even explain it. Stay happy and don't let dumb people or incidents bother you. Stay funny.

AJ - We met in elem. school for T&G and bonded over Beanie Babies in 7th grade. We have similar crazy fathers, funny mothers, and dad’s once again who try to be funny. We are so alike that it seriously scares me, with our interests and sense of humor. I mean, “Dirrty,” “Family Guy,” “Friends,” and “Mystery Date.” Thanks for always being there and laughing at a certain *cough* um, being.

---

Alex - Wow. We were friends for how long? It reality, only a few years since you came in 4th grade, but we played together EVERY DAY. We definitely drifted apart about 5-6 years ago, but I’ll always remember the great times we had together when we were kids.

Jenn - We were friends in the plays and have so many jokes it’s hard to count. Just remember Derek’s questions, the crazy janitors, and Doofus Bananas. Oh yes, and “Enie Meenie Miny El-Nino!”

To everyone else, good luck in life. I’ll miss all of you because each and every one of you took a part in my life. The only thing I can say is, see you at the reunion!

*This book is now closed* (written at 12:00 am EST, June 20, 2003)

Before I write my final entry in this journal, I'd like to write an entry about last weekend with prom and the weekend and everything else. My final entry will be posted on Friday-Graduation Day, and then I will be starting a new journal hopefully. If I can get a code. *hint hint If anyone wants to give me one* Or maybe I'll just write in a normal journal.
I want to start a new one because I feel like a chapter in my life is now ending and I want to start completely and utterly fresh and new.

Thursday the 5th I had to attend a Town Council meeting and it was pretty sad to see the people who run our town mocking a resident as he expressed his opinion. Needless to say it was boring and my friends and I wanted to run out and party like we should have. Instead, Walmart was the destination.

Friday was prom and my hair didn't look as though it was the result of an explosion on the east coast. Everything was fine and all of my friends were very pretty. We had fun except for a small mishap but all turned out well as we made the event an ongoing joke.

We went down the shore that night and got there at about 2:30 am. We then proceeded to listen to George, "the owner of the hotel," talk for 15 hours about what the rules were. Then we decided to go for a walk on the boardwalk where a scary man ran up to me, grabbed my hand, and kissed it, giving me "herpes of the hand" or so we called it. We also saw many of our classmates that night, some of which were high on "life" and also made fun of them for the next couple of days.

The next morning it was nothing short of a monsoon with the rain never ceasing. Amy and Cat were dancing in the rain which provided for some very amusing pictures. We were bored and decided to go for a walk which resulted in a week and a half long illness for me. Some other people came down for the day and it was fun driving through th huge puddles as I felt like Moses, parting the sea.

Sunday was filled with minature golfing, boardwalk walking, and sunburning. Great fun as it was actually nice outside. We left the hotel and went to Michelle's house for the night and acting psychotic as we laughed and talked with cups over our mouths.

Monday was time to go and Michelle and I were excited as we decided to blast Backstreet Boys music, old and older, the entire way home. Oh the memories, oh when those songs were new. My, how fast time flies by. I also went to a T&G party that night for the two teachers that were retiring and surprisingly enough, Mrs. Sig still did not remember us although she called me recently, and Mrs. Dolin did. Strange how things turn out. Then there were the people who used to go to school with us that we haven't seen in years. All look the same.....

I think that's all I really have to say right now. Just wanted to update you all on my life but there are plenty of other things I might want to add to this later. If not, talk to you on Friday. And if anyone besides my friends wants to read my new journal, please let me know and I will give you my new account name when I recieve it.

It's prom day!!!! I'm getting promerificly done now hehe and I'll update around Tuesday!!!! Peace out for now!

Because of a certain person *cough Kari* telling my brother that I write about him in my journal, I have to make any entries where I mention any of my families' names either friends-only or private. Her saying this resulted in a huge fight so now, against my wishes, this is the way it has to be.

Thank you Kari.

Which "Saved By The Bell" Character Are You?

How'd that happen?

It's just not right. Why? I feel so bad---especially for Cat.

I want to friggen go. He couldn't tell me before? No. He has to tell me 4 hours before we were supposed to go. When everyone already has the plans made and done.

Tender is the Night. It's not as though I don't want to read it. I don't like being timed when I read though. I like to read on my own time. I don't wanna read it now when I could be watching Rocky Horror with my friends instead.

It's not fair. I feel so friggen horrible I want to cry. Cat even came to the DQ to confirm the friggen plans. I think I'm gonna go cry now and get tears all over the stupid book.

Ryan Stiles


Which 'Whose Line is it Anyway?' actor are you!?
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Well a couple of things.

1. The play is over. Hard to believe it. We did awesome!!!!! Man it was incredible. Anyway, surprisingly enough, I hardly cried. Only backstage and during th elast song. Derek cried a little but Sam cried the most and Carly cried too.

2. Sonia got into Yale! Oh yeah, PRINCETON TOO!!!!! I'm so happy for her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG! She'll be right by me too!!!! Like, 20 mins away!!!!!

3. The Third Marking Period is Over. Well, over tomorrow! Hard to believe that too!!!! Damn, 9 weeks of school to go....

In the words of Megan: "HOLLAR!"

Well here it is folks...the home stretch. It's Sunday morning and in a few hours, I'll be leaving for the high school to get ready for my last performance on the RPHS stage. I know I've been talking about the play a lot so please, either skip the entry or bear with me.

Thursday night. Wasn't nervous until Act 2. As always. Not all of it though. Just when I have to sing my song. I sang it very well. In fact, the entire play went extremely well. Some things went wrong but Derek's improv. is amazing so it was all good. He actually stopped the show because the orchestra was sucking. (He can do that since he's the narrator)--Funny as hell.

Friday night. Most of my friends came. Once again, nervous before my song. In fact, (I'm blaming this on my cold) I cracked twice. Oh well. I was pretty upset over it but I would never ever show that onstage. The funniest thing I would have to say was at the end, when the goblet wasn't in the house and TJ came out with a rubber chicken. Derek took it, looked at the audience, and said "Intresting chicken bottle." and drank from it. The hardest thing I ever had to do was not laugh at that, and I have to say, I did laugh somewhat.

Saturday night: Well the sound was off and stuff and I had a feeling it would be bad, but it actually really well. I was praying practically the whole night that I would sing ok, and I did it perfectly. Afterwords, everyone told me it was my best performance.

I don't know what else to say except, Peace out to all of the young'uns and I hope they make the most out of these years like I did.

It's all becoming real. Tonight is Opening Night of the play. I can't believe it. Last night was our last rehersal. It was very upsetting last night to know that we'll never be getting our notes again, etc. I was hanging backstage with Shannon b4 Act 2 and I got so sad. But the improv. me and Bobby do is hysterical! It just makes me think back to 6th grade when we first started...and now we're in 12th grade and ending. It's just so unreal.
We performed at the elementary schools the last 2 days. First was Sherman. I wasn't in costume for that one but Bobby and I juggled. The kids LOVED it. They were cheering us on and it was just so great. The kids asked questions afterword and they were like, "How come the girl that juggled didn't do anything?" to which Jensyn replied, "It's a surprise. You have to come see the show for that." hehe.
Yesterday we went to Aldene in the morning and it was weird to see Mr. Costanzo introduce us (me and Derek) as former Aldene students. I wanted all of my old teachers to see me but most of them had moved to diff. schools or retired. I didn;t perform there either...neither did TJ or Jason. Then we went to the Middle School and the Robert Gordon kids were there too. I sang for them and I was nervous cuz Middle Schoolers are so critical. So blah blah blah then we all said our names, characters, grades, how many plays we've been in, and what we thought of the experience. It was so sad. Oh yeah, another thing, I drove Horn to the high school the other day from Sherman and that was incredibly strange.....

And guess what? I have a cold. Complete with post nasal drip and everything! GREAT TIMING!!!!!!

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
Thursday, March 27 - 7:30 pm
Friday, March 28 - 7:30 pm
Saturday, March 29 - 7:30 pm
Sunday, March 30 - 2:30 pm

Roselle Park High School
185 W. Webster Ave
Roselle Park, NJ 07204

I've decided that I have no friends...well, no true friends that I will be "friends forever" with. After being hurt two nights in a row by people that supposedly care, I've learned to face the facts.

This town sucks and so do all the people in it. I will no longer be nice to people that are not nice to me in return. I'm tired of being made fun of and laughing it off, or at least forgetting about it by the next day, only to face it once again.
I will no longer stick my neck out to help and invite others to do things.
These are my new resolutions which I intend to keep in every way possible. Now, I go to get ready for sleep because, well, then I don't have to think about things basically.

I was hurt. I didn't say it but I was. I would have at least thought that that person would have the decency to do the right thing.

I was today....hurt by myself. 5 days.....that's all. Just five more days and then we'll be on. 8 days and then we'll be off.

So yeah we open in less than 2 weeks which is just about the scariest thing in the world and also, I saw the ice cream truck on the way home today!!!!! That's just about the most exciting thing ever!!!!! Summer is on its sweet little way.

ANGER

1. Who did you last get angry with? The fucking Broadway people for going on fucking strike the day b4 I was supp. to go and meet Kevin and 2 days b4 my fucking birthday which I hate.
2. What is your weapon of choice? My words. HAHAHA (points and laughs)
3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex? Always do hehe...why not? Maybe a guy shouldn't hit a girl but the other way around is fine and dandy with me.
4. How about of the same sex? If they need it then yes.
5. Who was the last person who got really angry at you? I dunno. I would once again have to say my parents but I may be wrong.
6. What is your pet peeve? When people don't put their blinkers on!!!!! Also, when ppl are assholes, but hey, who does like that?
7. Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily? Both. I def. hold grudges against my family, or most of them, and sometimes with friends. With friends though, I usually let things go.

SLOTH

1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't done in a long time? Exercise...I need to get in serious shape.
2. What is the latest you've ever woken up? I woke up at 2 once but I only thought it was like 10. And I would've slept longer but I had to look at the stupid clock!
3. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't: Um, I guess Karen....ohhhh I miss her!
4. What is the last lame excuse you made? I don't remember. Sorry.
5. Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through (one of the long ones)? I watched the NADS one. Very "informal" - - - HAHAHAHA
6. When was the last time you got a good workout in? Today when I was singing the Jam song backstage with Bobby...man that gets tiring.
7. How many times did you hit the snooze button on your alarm clock today? None cuz I had to get up...I don't think I've ever hit it....Just ignored the sound.


GLUTTONY

1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice? I do not drink these yuppie beverages.
2. Meat eaters: mmmmmmm. Meat.
3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event?Haha just the wine at church...if you think I'm a dork, I DON'T CARE!!!!!
4. Have you ever used a professional diet company? I can't even stick to my own diet.
5. Do you have an issue with your weight? Well, I'm getting chubby though no one believes me....except my mom. It's cuz I'm "not in shape." I'm not overweight though.
6. Do you prefer sweets, salty foods, or spicy foods? Yummy junk food is for me.
7. Have you ever looked at a small housepet or child and thought, "LUNCH!"? CUDDLES!!!!! (no I don't want to eat her, just thinking about someone else wanting to)


LUST

1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting movies/family)? Um, one....and it was GROSS cuz I was 3 and it was not someone very pretty. *shivers*
2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family)? I guess no one.
3. Have you ever caught yourself staring at the chest/crotch of a member of your gender of choice during a normal conversation? Perhaps....... :)
4. Have you "done it"? ooooooooo....you did it!!!! AHHHH!!! My answer is no.
5. What is your favourite body part on a person of your gender of choice? Smile.
6. Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute? Only in my dreams......JUST KIDDING!
7. Have you ever had to get tested for an STD or pregnancy? No, Never!!!!! lalalala So fresh and so clean clean.


GREED

1. How many credit cards do you own?</b> None...thank god!
2. What's your guilty pleasure store?</b> I don't think I really have one. If I think of one, I'll post it l8er.
3. If you had $1 million, what would you do with it?</b> I would buy all the monkeys in the whole wide world and then I would feed them all bananas.
4. Would you rather be rich, or famous?</b> I think famous but I wouldn't want to have to deal with all the paparazzi. But then if I was rich, I would feel wasteful.
5. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks?</b> Depends on I would be doing exactly. Not like, shoveling manure or anything like that.
6. Have you ever stolen anything?</b> Pens with Julia cuz her mom said we could since the box was open. Little did we know she was kidding....
7. How many MP3s are on your hard drive?</b> I had over 400 but I just deleted about 250 cuz I needed to save space....don't worry: I put them all on CDs.


PRIDE

1. What one thing have you done that you're most proud of? Gotten the lead in the play. I mean, I guess I'll be more proud after I actually perform.
2. What one thing have you done that your parents are most proud of? Gotten in all my colleges and I'm in the National Honors Society.
3. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life? Get married and raise wonderful children...I would also like to be an actress but whatever.
4. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place? Yes. But then I think of the rhyme: First is the worst, Second is the best, Third is the one with the hair on the chest.
5. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors? Don't think so....
6. Have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score? On tests? All the time....not as much as I used to. but I mean, I don't just look at other people's papers. We all do it together.
7. What did you do today that you're proud of? I made it across twice in project adventure!!!!


ENVY

1. What item (or person) of your friends would you most want to have for your own? Maybe Hina's Invader Zim pillow...I have to put more thought into this.
2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with? Is that the show where you each decorate a room of each other's houses? If so, Michelle.
3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be? Someone who has the capabilities to make the world better....or stop the upcoming war.
4. Have you ever been cheated on? I have no one to cheat on me.
5. Have you ever wished you had a physical feature different from your own? A better nose or to be taller.
6. What inborn trait do you see in others that you wish you had for yourself? More patience.
7. Do you wish you'd come up with this survey? No...too long


FAITH

1. What religion do you follow? I am a born-again Christian.
2. What religion were you raised as? Same as above.
3. Do you believe that forgiveness is a religious property, or a human property? Religious.
4. Do you believe in magic? Well, illusions. So I guess.
5. What was the last promise you broke? I'll get back to you on that one.
6. Have you ever said the words to a prayer and not meant it? No.
7. Do you believe that anyone could be perfect? Only Jesus.


HOPE

1. Did you get everything you wanted over the last holiday season? No...I wanted my family to be happy.
2. Regarding your future, what is the best thing you could hope for? A nice family.
3. Do you let yourself get your hopes up for something even if you know that there is a large chance of failure? Yes although I know I shouldn't.
5. Have you ever bought a lottery ticket?!! What happened to number 4? Actually, today I bought my 1st one!! A bingo card..I didn't win though. :(
6. Do you gamble? If the lottery ticket and boardwalk counts.
7. Have you ever had something called off on account of bad weather, but then gone ahead and done it anyway? Well, just plans with friends I think....maybe more.


CHARITY

1. What causes do you support? Well there's causes I believe in but I don't give money. Like pro-life.
2. What causes have you given money or time to? Just tithes and offerings at church.
3. Have you ever worked in a soup kitchen or done another kind of outreach for the homeless? No but I wanted to.
4. Would you ever consider joining the Peace Corps, Amnesty International, or another travel-inherent worldwide charity group? No.....
5. Do you give money to the homeless on the street? My dad always told me not to cuz he said they'll prob. spend it on drinks but I don't always believe that. I don't usually see homeless people...
6. Have you ever helped out a friend with basic needs, like rent or food? No one's ever needed it...but then again, we're all 17 and 18.
7. What's the greatest extent you've gone to help a friend in need? Just been there for them when they needed compassion, etc.


FORTITUDE

1. What are you most afraid of? Not being happy when I'm older.
2. What did you do today that was really brave? Haha nothing.
3. Who is your favourite superhero, and why? Superman cuz he's hot, the nicest guy in the world, had the best TV show, has the greatest adventures, and was played by the hottest guy in the world: Dean Cain.
4. Would you put your life in danger to rescue someone? Depends who it is.
5. If you were to face the Wizard, would you want more courage, more brains, or more heart? I guess more courage...I think I'm def. sensitive enough and I think I'm smart enough--but that would be my 2nd choice.
6. Have you ever gotten stage fright? YES!!!!!
7. Do you consider yourself to be a leader or a follower? Depends on the situation. I mean, I like things done a certain way, but if I don't know what I'm doing, I'm a follower.


JUSTICE

1. Have you ever been summoned for jury duty? Were you chosen? Nope...just turned 18 today.
2. If they reinstituted the draft (for both genders), would you go, or would find some way out of it? Prob. try and find a way out...I hang my head in shame.
3. Do you support capital punishment (the death penalty)? Yes...if they are positive they did it.
4. Which should be guaranteed legal: Homosexual marriage. No....but this question doesn't really make any sense.
5. Do you believe that Dubya is rightfully President of the USA? Yes. They used the same method every other election, why not now?
6. What was your favourite media circus trial? OJ
7. Have you ever written a letter to a politician? Nope...


TEMPERANCE

1. What do you have the hardest time moderating yourself on? TV.
2. Do you collect anything? Erasers!
3. Are you addicted to anything? TV haha...not as bad anymore though.
4. Have you ever put anything on layaway or used an installment plan? No
5. What's your preferred method of paying for things? Cash
6. Tell us one thing you wish you hadn't let yourself do: Procrastinate on my work.
7. Do you feel that you obsess over things? Definitely..Superman, BSB, Friends, TV, etc.


PRUDENCE

1. Who is the wisest person you know? My Grandma
2. Have you ever participated in a vigil? No.
3. Do you take advice when it's given? Depends on how good it is.
4. What area are you wisest? I dunno...helping people out.
5. Do you drive defensively? Yeah I do
6. Have you ever had unprotected sex outside of marriage? Would you ever? Never have and never would.
7. What did you learn today? That life sux.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, it did. My birthday this year is offically the worst one of my life. I thought last year's would be hard to top, but hey, this year takes the cake. No pun intended.

Oh, but I would like to give a big shoutout to my friends who threw me a surprise party: Sonia, Amy, Michelle, Anuja, Payal, Gati, Hina, Denise, Lori, Jess, and AJ and Carmene (who couldn't be there but still tried). At least they tried to make this year good.

Going to see Kevvy Kev on Sunday in the musical!!! HOORAY FOR ME!!!

Which chicago Character Are You?

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I was supposed to go to TCNJ today but now I'm not so sure cuz of the snow.

Speaking of the snow, I want to kill those other people in my class who act like 5 year olds!!! I mean, why do they feel the need to put their books on my car, and why do they have to have snowball fights right in front of me, thus causing the snow to fly into my face?

Speaking of cars, I want to kill those other people in my grade who "make up" parking spots. I mean, fine, if ur not blocking anyone else in. But yesterday, it was IMPOSSIBLE for me and Cassie (esp. me) to leave until these like 3 other cars moved. And the owners of these cars are bullshitting somewhere off in Never NeverLand while I have things to do and have to LEAVE! And today, some asshole parked right behind me. Like, directly. GET THERE EARLY ASSHOLES.

So yesterday, my grandfather was in church and apparantly, he fainted and they called 911 and stuff and he's in the hospital. So my grandma told my mom that there were all these people crying and the priest came over and read him his last rites or something and they all thought he was dead. And I'm like, "no one bothered to check for a pulse?" So then, my mom's cousin who was there when it happened, talked to my mom and was like, "that never happened." so yea, he just fainted and is in the hospital and I guess my Grandma is crazy but hey I still luv her.

BTW, I changed and then fixed my colors. ALL BETTER NOW!

I got into all my schools and I've pretty much decided I'm going to TCNJ!!!!!! Peace OUT!

I know I said I was gonna update l8er, but um, I really have nothing much to say. My life is pretty boring right now. There's the normal thing with deciding over colleges, thinking about prom, and worrying about grades and sleep. But whatever....I swear that I'll update the next time something of importance happens to me. Until then, I don't want to bore all of you. Peace out and Have a Peacful Day.